About Trauma & Narcissistic Abuse Recovery
I believe you.
I understand you.
You are not alone.
Narcissistic abuse is very insidious.
Once I understood that there was a NAME for what I was going through and there were actual TERMS and DEFINITIONS of the abuse tactics that I was subjected to… everything changed. I slowly began to put the pieces together of all the crazy-making and abuse I endured. This is the first step toward healing.
Now, in addition to being certified in The Adult Chair model, I am also a certified, trauma-informed narcissistic abuse recovery specialist.
Have you been in a relationship with a narcissist?
Narcissist Red Flags:
🚩 Refuses to take any personal responsibility for their actions. Blames everyone/everything else.
🚩 Highly reactive to any feedback. Very sensitive to criticism.
🚩 Loyalty towards you is superficial at best. Engages in pathological lies and cheating.
🚩 Often has addictions.
🚩 Capable of atrocious behavior.
🚩 Can be very passive aggresive.
🚩 Public self and private self do not match. Wears different “masks” out in public to impress others vs. at home in private. For example, may be charismatic in public then changes quickly to being punishing at home (i.e. silent treatment, lashing out).
🚩 Gets bored easily. Relies on others for supply and entertainment.
🚩 Grandiose sense of self-importance. Talks about glory days over and over.
🚩 Uses “love bombing” and “mirroring” at beginning of relationship to draw you in.
🚩 Has a sense of entitlement; thinks rules do not apply to them.
🚩 Unable to express genuine compassion and empathy.
🚩 Preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, money, ideal love, etc.
🚩 Requires excessive admiration. Believes they are more “special” than others and expect special treatment.
🚩 Their actions do not match their words.
🚩 False humility.
One common abuse tactic used by narcissists is called Gaslighting.
It is used to create confusion and self-doubt by intentionally twisting your perception of reality for their own gain. Is this familiar?
Here’s what it sounds like:
“You’re overreacting.”
“I never said that.”
“I didn’t do that.”
“Just calm down.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You’re upset over nothing.”
“I was just joking.”
“You are always so dramatic.”
“You need help.”
“Stop imagining things.”
“You are so sensitive.”
“You didn’t see that.”
It can be very eye-opening once you begin to see the narcissist and their tactics of abuse. The next important step is to look inward in order to heal the trauma you have experienced.
I know the hardest step is sometimes reaching out for help.
I understand. I was there too, but to begin to truly heal, it is important to connect and engage in experiences that signal to your body that you are safe.
Your nervous system has been in survival mode.
It’s number one job has been to keep you safe.
To do that, it goes into a Fight, Flight, Freeze or Fawn response.
So you may be experiencing:
Anxiety
Depression
Hyper-vigilance
Self-doubt
Excessive worry
Panic attacks
Feeling of being stuck or trapped
Exhaustion
Overwhelm
Feelings of hopelessness
Fear for your personal safety
Impaired concentration and memory
Insomnia and nightmares
Other physical ailments
Feeling numb
Together, we can begin to regulate and calm your nervous system and allow the healing to begin. I became a certified trauma-informed narcissist abuse recovery specialist to help women who experience narcissistic abuse to heal more quickly.
